Them 12 golden hours

We didnt wait for months for our fertility appointments, just a couple of days. I had to have blood tests done on particular days and hubby had to fill a pot with his Best brew. aw bless him, dont they make a big deal out of a small thing (snigger) I have never known him go so quiet and act so sheepish since the morning of our wedding. All he had to do was fill a pot but you would have though he had been scolded by his head master when he got back.

Anyway he did his bit and I did mine.

Well I was surprised and relieved when I found out the problem did not lie with me, let me explain why....

1) Hubby couldn't hold it against me in future arguments.

2) I wasn't a failure of a woman after all.

3) I didn't have to waste money on expensive pregnancy tests.

4) I expected my period so stopped getting upset when it arrived.

5) We could continue to have sex for pleasure again without any pressure.

Now the last one is very important. If you have read any other blogs about infertility then you will know how horrid and mechanical sex can get when your trying to hit them 12 golden hours that an egg waits patiently.

It was such a relief for us both to go back to normal, casual, whenever-we-want-dont-think-about-baby-making sex which we did, frequently.

Obviously I am not a complete bitch and I have a lot of sympathy for hubby and how he must be feeling about it. But we talked about it and I promised him that I would never use it against him in an argument, no matter how nasty it got, and that we would not tell anyone about his infertility or treatment.

Yeah ok, I have technically broken the last promise cos you all know about it now, but he doesnt know I have told you all so just keep quiet and he will never need to know.

Now because of hubbys er, issue, we were referred for IVF straight away. Now all we had to do was pick a clinic.

So earlier in the day we were nervous but looking forward to getting treatment, now we only had one option which was the biggee and nothing else to try. We were officially infertile with not a hope in hell's chance of concieving on our own (ok they didnt actually say that but its how I interpreted it that way)

There were a few tears (from me, not hubby) then lots of anger because its unfair. Proper childish stomping and moaning followed with tears of frustration. Luckily hubby offered to get fish and chips for tea so everything was ok. We hugged and agreed we would investigate it thoroughly to take away the fear and we would be there for each other. Doesnt a take away always make things seem batter, i mean better,